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back in the day Posted 6/13/2006 1:51:39 PM i was just reading over my dead journal from like a million years ago .. &i realized that i haven`t changed all that much when it comes to blogging. just bitch &moan about the things that go wrong in my life. so i decided that instead of complaining .. this entry`ll be reminiscant [if that`s even a word]. i miss the good old days. where i would wake up at six in the morning to get dressed to impress [in a casual way] &head off to McArthur High School. i remember having to take to turnpike to get to school because i had moved &was supposed to go to a different school. my mom complained everyday about how she had to take me to school &how she hated living in florida. that`s when i was living with my mom of course. i miss her having to come in my room in the morning cos i`d never wake up on time. well .. when i got to school i would head straight over to the "wall" , where all the cool kids would hang out. i made my first friend at that wall .. or so i think. i would just sit there &talk to who ever the hell showed up or just wait for rosemary. then head of to first hour, complain about mr. macdonald when algebra II rolled around and then sit at the wall again for lunch. or even the days before that. my freshman year... [aaaah .. freshman year]. where i would hang around my brother [who was a senior at the time] and we still had open campus lunch so i would leave with him and his friends and sometimes just not come back to school. or i`d leave with rosemary and her boyfriend at the time [who always had us laughing].. or damn .. even before that .. middle school coming into highschool i already knew my brothers friends. this is the year i`ll never forget cos i fell into the lake . &the little thing i had with my brothers friend.. ha!! now THAT was funny. hmm .. makes me wonder ..was life always as confusing as it is now?! did i always complain this much? or is like actually getting better . cos i CAN somewhat remember not always being happy. but for some reason looking back into the past at the things that made me laugh , i forget the things that made me cry. the crying i do remember was when my mom told me she had finally had enough of florida and was moving back to boston. BOSTON?! i remember being on the phone with rosemary and trying to hide my tears .. not let her know i was crying. i told her i was leaving &she cried. . that`s when it all just came out. moving to hialeah with my dad was hard i guess. i remember just being happy that i didnt HAVE to move up north &that there was another option. but i wasnt gonna get off as easy as i had before when it came to schools .. changing schools was i think by far one of the hardest things i had to do. coming into a new school you just wanna be accepted even if its not for who you are. i guess you can say i wasnt myself the first couple of days.. what i liked about changing schools and meeting new people is that i found myself &who i really am. there was no reason for me to try and act like someone else before. &i realized that all those times that i was happy before .. i wasn`t me. therefore .. i was never really that happy. now things are different. . yea i listen to different types of music not like before when i thought i was all about fake hip hop that only talked about ass shaking &booty dropping. [or like my dad likes to say "i`ll turn you out &show you what you ate for dinner" music] but now that i`m myself.. what i listen to .. is what i can relate to. maybe not always dance to.. but comprehend. i now know why i listen to what i listen to .. not like before when i didn`t even know the meanings of the songs that i liked. and it bothers me when i hear someone say that they love 50 cent and that juelz santana is what its all about. . do they even listen to the words in these songs?! like .. really .. c`mon now .. lets be serious. and just because young jeezy raps about how he used to sell drugs to make a living .. doesn`t mean YOU did. so wake up little wankster .. this is your reality. &that`s a whole other blog entry. &although there is no wall at my new school .. and no particular clique i choose to be with.. i found me .. &i like that .. and apparantly so does everyone else (0) Comments

party monster?! Posted 6/11/2006 7:24:31 PM this movie is .. the shit !! i found myself really being into movies lately. maybe it`s just cause i`ve been here are mo`s &lily`s. here`s a list so far: •ready to rumble •sonny •garden state •wedding crashers •ocean`s twelve •just friends •i ♥ huckabees [for the like .. millionth time] .. i know there`s more that i`ve seen just in this week. just can`t quite remember the other ones but i know there was more. well yea. . movies rock .. lol . i`ll be back =]] (0) Comments

a little taste of me. Posted 6/10/2006 4:39:34 PM just the day before yesterday i made a disturbing discovery in realizing that for some reason most of my life i`ve been on the outside looking in.. it sucksmost of the time there`s a problem. i`m not in it. i`m usually the one people come to for advice &i have to help THEM figure things out. look into their eyes for a while. but never actually the one with a dilemma. i`m not saying i`d like to have a life full of drama .. but i thought human drama was inevitable... well .. i guess just not in my case. maybe there are more people like me who just kinda sit back &watch things happen. more people who just kinda watch as others say "why me?!" and ask "why NOT me?" .. i guess i`m fortunate &should count my blessings. .my ONE main problem has to do [of course] with the opposite sex. ugh .. i hate the fact that when i`m || close to thinking i found the right person .. i`m wrong . i`m always wrong. . it`s frustrating.. but i know i`m NOT the only one with THAT problem. &it`s like whenever i`m not looking for someone, they come along. . &it`s always the wrong person. for example : i`ve known [he shall remain nameless] for five years now.. 2 of those 5 years i`ve felt something for him. . i`ve just given up all hope cause i realized that i`m in the friend zone &probably will always be stuck in it. when i first saw the movie "Just Friends" i felt like i was watching my whole life story [just as a man]. ugh ... oh well .. guess you just got a taste of whats running through my mind.. random &pointless .. but me =/ (0) Comments

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General Comments Noel Posted 11/12/2006 12:08:17 AM hello .. can you be my NB frnd ..im from the Philippines, thanks and God Bless Please login to post a comment.