groove_monster
I am Becca! Hear me roar! "RAWR"
Profile
Ok, so I am Rebecca. I live in Llanelli, Wales. It's a total armpit but until I get off my bum and get a decent income I'm stuck here.
I play the drums. I'm still a n00b so don't expect much from me.
Age: 21
Gender: F
Location: Wales, UK
General: In my spare time I enjoy being generally very crazy. I have done some truely odd things including dressing like a man (complete with handlebar moustache) and asking women out, to throwing a tantrum in McDonalds when refused a serving of bolognese
Music: I love music and I constantly have my earphones in. My favourite bands include Foo Fighters, Muse, Ok Go, Incubus, RHCP, ELO, The Beatles, The Kinks, Elton John(yes I know), Jack Johnson and many others. I have limited room for lists you know!
TV: Loves the Simpsons, Futurama, Family Guy, Braniac, Scrubs, Everybody Loves Raymond, CSI, Law and Order, Eastenders (sorry), Malcom in the Middle and, yes I am sad, Smallville and desperate housewives
Films: I am not that fussed on films. If it's scary or gory I'll watch it and love it. No matter how cheesy. Although I love certain feel-good films such as Frequency, Bridget Jones and I LOVE Disney!
Books: Any one who truely knows me, knows that I read until my eyes bleed. I'll read books like I drink water. Quickly and in large quantities. My favourtie authors include Phillip Pullman, Steven King, Grant + Naylor, Douglas Adams, Nick Hornby, J.K Rowling. I'
Heroes: My sister is a hero. She's raising a child alone at 20 and doing wonderfully. My friend Ana is a hero. She's had life rain on her constantly and still keeps on going and makes me laugh.
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Yay! I'm back
Posted 10/9/2006 10:32:55 AM
Well here I am once again boring you all with the stuff in my head.
I went out walking with Jess and looking at the leaves on the ground and the damp floor made me think "wow, it's Autumn." Yeah, it's only just hit me that Summer is over. And it got me all nostalgic. Like when I was little and just moved here and how I liked to jump on the leaves and hear the *crunch* Ah, life was so simple then. When did I get old and start worrying over things like money, friends and life?
I remember once when I was about ten and I didn't want my uncle to go home so I snuck into the back of his van and didn't tell him I was there until he had gone past the bridge. He was mad
And once I told my dad me and my puppy were going round a friend's for the night but what I had actually done was slept out in the shed (R.I.P). I had done it up with old carpet and gotten a couple of our outcast matresses and we all bundled in. It was warm and comfy and cosy. We all woke up at 6am and took the go-kart down a hill behind my house. Some old bag came out of her house yelling at the noise we were making so we held a competition to see who could pull the biggest skids outside her door. We were horrid kids
And now here I am not sure where I'm going to be living, what I'm going to be doing or how I'm going to survive. No one is looking after me anymore. But it's kinda exciting. New Scary but exciting.
Posted 10/9/2006 10:32:55 AM
Well here I am once again boring you all with the stuff in my head.
I went out walking with Jess and looking at the leaves on the ground and the damp floor made me think "wow, it's Autumn." Yeah, it's only just hit me that Summer is over. And it got me all nostalgic. Like when I was little and just moved here and how I liked to jump on the leaves and hear the *crunch* Ah, life was so simple then. When did I get old and start worrying over things like money, friends and life?
I remember once when I was about ten and I didn't want my uncle to go home so I snuck into the back of his van and didn't tell him I was there until he had gone past the bridge. He was mad
And once I told my dad me and my puppy were going round a friend's for the night but what I had actually done was slept out in the shed (R.I.P). I had done it up with old carpet and gotten a couple of our outcast matresses and we all bundled in. It was warm and comfy and cosy. We all woke up at 6am and took the go-kart down a hill behind my house. Some old bag came out of her house yelling at the noise we were making so we held a competition to see who could pull the biggest skids outside her door. We were horrid kids
And now here I am not sure where I'm going to be living, what I'm going to be doing or how I'm going to survive. No one is looking after me anymore. But it's kinda exciting. New Scary but exciting.
alcohol...
Posted 6/5/2006 1:27:32 PM
is bad. jess and i discovered that when she made me drunk the other night... ok, well she didn't make me drink. But we got piddled none the less :D
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Njfh5P2yn_4
check it :)
Posted 6/5/2006 1:27:32 PM
is bad. jess and i discovered that when she made me drunk the other night... ok, well she didn't make me drink. But we got piddled none the less :D
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Njfh5P2yn_4
check it :)
genius
Posted 5/31/2006 6:59:39 PM
Derren Brown - sheer genius!
I watched a show where he took 10 people which he whittled down to 4 depending on their mental state. He then played really subtle mind manipulation tricks on them til they started associating colours and music with a certain feeling.
Anyway, to top it all off, these four people were exposed, one after the other, to a guard getting into a van with 100,000 pounds. Three out of four people took out a toy gun they had been given and held him up.
It was dead crazy!!
When interviewed they had no idea what the hell had possesed them to do it. They then had to be reprogrammed over a couple of months.
But it was so damn clever.
Derren Brown - GENIUS!!
Posted 5/31/2006 6:59:39 PM
Derren Brown - sheer genius!
I watched a show where he took 10 people which he whittled down to 4 depending on their mental state. He then played really subtle mind manipulation tricks on them til they started associating colours and music with a certain feeling.
Anyway, to top it all off, these four people were exposed, one after the other, to a guard getting into a van with 100,000 pounds. Three out of four people took out a toy gun they had been given and held him up.
It was dead crazy!!
When interviewed they had no idea what the hell had possesed them to do it. They then had to be reprogrammed over a couple of months.
But it was so damn clever.
Derren Brown - GENIUS!!
pregnant
Posted 5/30/2006 4:42:39 PM
that's how i look
my stomach has gone like this in the space of two days.
from being flat as a wash board to swelling up.
TWO days
I am hating my glandular fever
WHY AM I NOT GETTING BETTER???
i could cry
Posted 5/30/2006 4:42:39 PM
that's how i look
my stomach has gone like this in the space of two days.
from being flat as a wash board to swelling up.
TWO days
I am hating my glandular fever
WHY AM I NOT GETTING BETTER???
i could cry
RIP LUCY
Posted 5/23/2006 5:26:11 PM
Lucy went missing last Christmas. It ruined everything about Christmas. We found her. Both pieces.
Lucy got hit by a train near Trostre, Llanelli. She was 2 this year.
Lucy liked hugs and staring at my hamsters as well as chasing her tails, running in circles when excited and chewing the hem on my trousers. She loved cheese and more than once she got a telling off for jumping in our dinner plates. But we loved her anyway because she was a family member.
I am so hurt right now
Posted 5/23/2006 5:26:11 PM
Lucy went missing last Christmas. It ruined everything about Christmas. We found her. Both pieces.
Lucy got hit by a train near Trostre, Llanelli. She was 2 this year.
Lucy liked hugs and staring at my hamsters as well as chasing her tails, running in circles when excited and chewing the hem on my trousers. She loved cheese and more than once she got a telling off for jumping in our dinner plates. But we loved her anyway because she was a family member.
I am so hurt right now
myspace
Posted 5/16/2006 7:36:06 PM
Oh yes, and because it seems the custom on newblog, check out my myspace www.myspace.com/randomgroover
Posted 5/16/2006 7:36:06 PM
Oh yes, and because it seems the custom on newblog, check out my myspace www.myspace.com/randomgroover
RE: watch this space
Posted 5/16/2006 7:34:54 PM
Ok, so I am a happy bunny :) It all worked out. I have a fantastic boyfriend who treats me like a princess and my dad returning home wasn't as bad as it usually is. Usually when he returns we follow a routine
1. we argue over my routine
2. he re-arranges my routine
3. i ignore his routine
4. we have blazing row where I remind him I am an adult
5. he gradually accepts i am a mature woman, not the teenager he left behind.
6. we live together in peace for a bit before he leaves.
This time though, we've skipped 2,3 and 4. :) happy days.
Jess has stayed over the last two days. She was down in the dumps. So Ryan being lovely and amazing cheered us both up.
We have the best times together. We bought doghnuts and pizza and watched bridget's jones' diaries TWICE :D:D:D
Posted 5/16/2006 7:34:54 PM
Ok, so I am a happy bunny :) It all worked out. I have a fantastic boyfriend who treats me like a princess and my dad returning home wasn't as bad as it usually is. Usually when he returns we follow a routine
1. we argue over my routine
2. he re-arranges my routine
3. i ignore his routine
4. we have blazing row where I remind him I am an adult
5. he gradually accepts i am a mature woman, not the teenager he left behind.
6. we live together in peace for a bit before he leaves.
This time though, we've skipped 2,3 and 4. :) happy days.
Jess has stayed over the last two days. She was down in the dumps. So Ryan being lovely and amazing cheered us both up.
We have the best times together. We bought doghnuts and pizza and watched bridget's jones' diaries TWICE :D:D:D
becca lost her smiley face :(
Posted 5/13/2006 6:38:33 PM
Ok, so as I have mentioned I have had glandular fever (mono if you're an american reading this) and I've had it badly.
So now the colleg are on my back asking me to do things I am physically and mentally incapable of doing. I am so stressed I am getting short term memory blanks. Apparently I was in college last Friday. I went to pick up work. Wynne even gave me a hug.
I remember none of it.
It's worrying the hell out of me. What if I can't go to college again? What if I go off on the sick? Become dole scum? What if I am stuck watching TV for the rest of my days because I can't go out because I will just keep getting this damn ill!!??
AAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH
Edit: "dole scum" was not meant to be a comment directed at people on the dole, but at myself. I have had high expectations of myself and from others ever since my IQ was measured at stupidly high levels and to be so incapable is frustrating me because my mind is being held back by my body. Sorry to offend.
Posted 5/13/2006 6:38:33 PM
Ok, so as I have mentioned I have had glandular fever (mono if you're an american reading this) and I've had it badly.
So now the colleg are on my back asking me to do things I am physically and mentally incapable of doing. I am so stressed I am getting short term memory blanks. Apparently I was in college last Friday. I went to pick up work. Wynne even gave me a hug.
I remember none of it.
It's worrying the hell out of me. What if I can't go to college again? What if I go off on the sick? Become dole scum? What if I am stuck watching TV for the rest of my days because I can't go out because I will just keep getting this damn ill!!??
AAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH
Edit: "dole scum" was not meant to be a comment directed at people on the dole, but at myself. I have had high expectations of myself and from others ever since my IQ was measured at stupidly high levels and to be so incapable is frustrating me because my mind is being held back by my body. Sorry to offend.
spirit is willing, flesh is weak
Posted 5/11/2006 8:18:35 PM
People really don't have enough empathy any more. I mean, not genuine empathy. They see a situation they may never have actually been in themselves, judge it from how they would handle it, and judge the person accordingly. That isn't empathy. That is narrow mindedness
Before you judge a man, walk a mile in their shoes
Some thing i can totally relate to.
At the end of the day every body's feelings are unique and no one can tell some one that they are wrong for how they feel.
So before taking the reins and yelling and screaming take a moment to see their situation, whether or not they are/were happy and throw them a freaking bone!!
The spirit is willing and the flesh is weak
People make mistakes. Makes us human. No one is perfect. Fact is, people get ruled by their hearts more than their heads. No matter how much people try to deny it, it's true.
We can't help hating some one, loving some one, being confused. It controls our decisions. At the end of the day the basic human instinct is to be happy. It can make us do silly things but it is all part of life.
It grates me totally when some one sees a situation and tuts without having experiencing it first hand.
Not naming names, but a certain person I know (and no one else actually does) decided that depression is a load of tosh and people should "snap out of it." Having suffered clinical depression myself I realise that it is not a case of "snapping out of it" and that it is incredibly hard to get over it.
So will all those people out there who think they can judge a situation they have never been in think twice before having a go. It seems to be all people are doing recently and it is getting on my tits!
Posted 5/11/2006 8:18:35 PM
People really don't have enough empathy any more. I mean, not genuine empathy. They see a situation they may never have actually been in themselves, judge it from how they would handle it, and judge the person accordingly. That isn't empathy. That is narrow mindedness
Before you judge a man, walk a mile in their shoes
Some thing i can totally relate to.
At the end of the day every body's feelings are unique and no one can tell some one that they are wrong for how they feel.
So before taking the reins and yelling and screaming take a moment to see their situation, whether or not they are/were happy and throw them a freaking bone!!
The spirit is willing and the flesh is weak
People make mistakes. Makes us human. No one is perfect. Fact is, people get ruled by their hearts more than their heads. No matter how much people try to deny it, it's true.
We can't help hating some one, loving some one, being confused. It controls our decisions. At the end of the day the basic human instinct is to be happy. It can make us do silly things but it is all part of life.
It grates me totally when some one sees a situation and tuts without having experiencing it first hand.
Not naming names, but a certain person I know (and no one else actually does) decided that depression is a load of tosh and people should "snap out of it." Having suffered clinical depression myself I realise that it is not a case of "snapping out of it" and that it is incredibly hard to get over it.
So will all those people out there who think they can judge a situation they have never been in think twice before having a go. It seems to be all people are doing recently and it is getting on my tits!
Subject : Tavistock assault
Posted 5/8/2006 3:01:12 PM
See previous entry to understand what this email means
Subject : Tavistock assault
| | | Inbox
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Attachment : DSC001442.JPG (0.03 MB)
Hi Contacts
Sorry about the impersonal email (i.e. send to all contacts), but a recent event (Saturday night) has left me with a large request for information on a certain event.
I am struggling to repeat a story to many different people, which I don’t yet have full knowledge on, so hopefully this will clear things up for those who are interested; (those that are not intrigued by a friend’s mutation into the elephant man can look away now).
Jokes aside, Saturday I was assaulted outside the kebab house in Tavistock. My one companion, owing to a large stint in the Chichester arms, celebrating my football teams league title victory, was Swifty (see pic). He, frustratingly, did not see what happened and I am yet to get hold of a reliable source.
As I was lining up for my pizza a rather annoying, loud and irritating girl started pushing in and giving aggressive looks. Most of you who have been out with a drunken me will know that I usually don’t keep my head down; always a great tactician in the hands of the local riffraff. My tongue, humour and face does not seem to go down well quite often (people prefer fights over humility) and after joking around with this girl, she did not see the funny side and went for help. I just remember her screeching with an ugly face and sour expression. She kept looking in from outside, so (with drink in me) I went to stick my “V” sign up and upon doing so, realised that my middle finger was strapped to the next one (broken via football), therefore giving a 3 finger V sign, totally nullifying its effect. I found this rather funny (because I’m obviously a sad gimp) and did it more than once (nothing like wearing a joke as soon as it's created). Obviously it irritated the silly bitch further. The next thing I know, I am being aggressively spoken to by some guy called “Chinney” (I know; compatible name with my face an hour later) who is telling me to get lost/fuck off etc etc. I can not seem to be able to shoot myself down and just say: “yes, I will fuck off because you are not worth my time”, but instead I stood my ground. I didn’t get violent or aggressive (why would I when the “Chinster” is 6ft 3). I eventually moved on from “Chinney” to go out the door (by this time my pizza had arrived) only to be confronted by a new face; this one looked identical to Seth Lakeman (a younger version) and he is the last face I remember. He was not being aggressive, but I was obviously still agitated and not the friendliest. Anyway, that’s fucking it. The next memory is being semi-conscious in the middle of the road with an ambulance and several people around me.
Eight stitches, a broken nose and cuts beneath the nose and to the chin were my injuries. The pictures show the day after and the day after the day after, where my eyes swelled to that of a heavy weight boxer, causing a half blind sensation. After asking how long it was going to be in Derriford (not in the happiest of tones), I was told to sit down and “shut up” by a rather cocky, young admin guy. He then went on with his verbal attack quoting I deserved a hammering – you just can't beat the service with the NHS. I was absolutely fumed by his conduct (i know mine would not have been the best) and in the end a couple of security guards were installed to keep an eye on me - joyous. Luckily the specialist was a good chap; the same guy who went through my brothers broken collar bone x-ray some weeks before. He came out with some fancy Rugby stories and that was that, I was ready to go home. Swifty had driven in, to which I was extremely grateful and he took me home in the early hours.
Looking at my injuries and the fact I have no idea what happened, I was obviously well knocked out by certainly more than just a fist. A bottle from behind, when I was talking to the guy in the doorway, or a head-butt are Jeremy, James and my assessment to the possibilities. I think also, the impact of the fall onto the road may have had some say. I may have to see the nose specialist (should have gone before the accident to be fair, but now I have a real excuse). If there is permanent deformation, I shall inevitably be gutted, not the fact my modelling days would be over, more that I have had a part of me changed in an event and by a person I wish never existed.
The policeman arrived the day after and pushed me into signing not to press charges, but having had a proper think and talking to family, I don’t think I have much choice but to punish the offender. The police know who it was, but cleverly, in today’s law, I was not aloud to know due to data protection. He ran from the scene and was not caught by the police, or two people who knew me (Swifty didn’t run, he wasn’t fit enough – haha). I was a bit shocked, looking back, that the policeman said I could even get done for incitement/provocation, under some stupid act, but obviously he just didn’t want me to press charges and increase his work load. He said witnesses stated I was “obnoxious” (so what's new then??) but even so, that can never condone actual bodily harm, that’s my view anyway.
Mums friend has since visited the kebab shop and ask the guys there. They didn’t see what happened and described me as: “nice boy, he friend, he is gentle boy” So….There’s your obnoxious hoodlum for ya! Pizza on the house boys?
It’s nice to have these life updates isn't it – full of self indulgence and sympathetic requests. Maybe next time I shall be able to inform about happy events, such as babies and weddings, but for now, you will have to accept the elephant man story and enjoy the lovely pictures attached.
Give up drink? Give up going out? No! Give up satire with Tavistock scallies? Errr.. yes!
Posted 5/8/2006 3:01:12 PM
See previous entry to understand what this email means
Subject : Tavistock assault
| | | Inbox
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Attachment : DSC001442.JPG (0.03 MB)
Hi Contacts
Sorry about the impersonal email (i.e. send to all contacts), but a recent event (Saturday night) has left me with a large request for information on a certain event.
I am struggling to repeat a story to many different people, which I don’t yet have full knowledge on, so hopefully this will clear things up for those who are interested; (those that are not intrigued by a friend’s mutation into the elephant man can look away now).
Jokes aside, Saturday I was assaulted outside the kebab house in Tavistock. My one companion, owing to a large stint in the Chichester arms, celebrating my football teams league title victory, was Swifty (see pic). He, frustratingly, did not see what happened and I am yet to get hold of a reliable source.
As I was lining up for my pizza a rather annoying, loud and irritating girl started pushing in and giving aggressive looks. Most of you who have been out with a drunken me will know that I usually don’t keep my head down; always a great tactician in the hands of the local riffraff. My tongue, humour and face does not seem to go down well quite often (people prefer fights over humility) and after joking around with this girl, she did not see the funny side and went for help. I just remember her screeching with an ugly face and sour expression. She kept looking in from outside, so (with drink in me) I went to stick my “V” sign up and upon doing so, realised that my middle finger was strapped to the next one (broken via football), therefore giving a 3 finger V sign, totally nullifying its effect. I found this rather funny (because I’m obviously a sad gimp) and did it more than once (nothing like wearing a joke as soon as it's created). Obviously it irritated the silly bitch further. The next thing I know, I am being aggressively spoken to by some guy called “Chinney” (I know; compatible name with my face an hour later) who is telling me to get lost/fuck off etc etc. I can not seem to be able to shoot myself down and just say: “yes, I will fuck off because you are not worth my time”, but instead I stood my ground. I didn’t get violent or aggressive (why would I when the “Chinster” is 6ft 3). I eventually moved on from “Chinney” to go out the door (by this time my pizza had arrived) only to be confronted by a new face; this one looked identical to Seth Lakeman (a younger version) and he is the last face I remember. He was not being aggressive, but I was obviously still agitated and not the friendliest. Anyway, that’s fucking it. The next memory is being semi-conscious in the middle of the road with an ambulance and several people around me.
Eight stitches, a broken nose and cuts beneath the nose and to the chin were my injuries. The pictures show the day after and the day after the day after, where my eyes swelled to that of a heavy weight boxer, causing a half blind sensation. After asking how long it was going to be in Derriford (not in the happiest of tones), I was told to sit down and “shut up” by a rather cocky, young admin guy. He then went on with his verbal attack quoting I deserved a hammering – you just can't beat the service with the NHS. I was absolutely fumed by his conduct (i know mine would not have been the best) and in the end a couple of security guards were installed to keep an eye on me - joyous. Luckily the specialist was a good chap; the same guy who went through my brothers broken collar bone x-ray some weeks before. He came out with some fancy Rugby stories and that was that, I was ready to go home. Swifty had driven in, to which I was extremely grateful and he took me home in the early hours.
Looking at my injuries and the fact I have no idea what happened, I was obviously well knocked out by certainly more than just a fist. A bottle from behind, when I was talking to the guy in the doorway, or a head-butt are Jeremy, James and my assessment to the possibilities. I think also, the impact of the fall onto the road may have had some say. I may have to see the nose specialist (should have gone before the accident to be fair, but now I have a real excuse). If there is permanent deformation, I shall inevitably be gutted, not the fact my modelling days would be over, more that I have had a part of me changed in an event and by a person I wish never existed.
The policeman arrived the day after and pushed me into signing not to press charges, but having had a proper think and talking to family, I don’t think I have much choice but to punish the offender. The police know who it was, but cleverly, in today’s law, I was not aloud to know due to data protection. He ran from the scene and was not caught by the police, or two people who knew me (Swifty didn’t run, he wasn’t fit enough – haha). I was a bit shocked, looking back, that the policeman said I could even get done for incitement/provocation, under some stupid act, but obviously he just didn’t want me to press charges and increase his work load. He said witnesses stated I was “obnoxious” (so what's new then??) but even so, that can never condone actual bodily harm, that’s my view anyway.
Mums friend has since visited the kebab shop and ask the guys there. They didn’t see what happened and described me as: “nice boy, he friend, he is gentle boy” So….There’s your obnoxious hoodlum for ya! Pizza on the house boys?
It’s nice to have these life updates isn't it – full of self indulgence and sympathetic requests. Maybe next time I shall be able to inform about happy events, such as babies and weddings, but for now, you will have to accept the elephant man story and enjoy the lovely pictures attached.
Give up drink? Give up going out? No! Give up satire with Tavistock scallies? Errr.. yes!
Tear - stained and upset
Posted 5/7/2006 7:46:50 PM
People are animals some times.
Totally barbaric.
My friend Mark got knifed by a gang of about 30 yobs a few days ago. Fortunately it was a flesh wound. What bothers me was their reasoning. They had none. They did it because they could.
Then, yesterday, my (as good as) brother, my best friend, my Dan, got kicked in. His whole face is broken. His nose swollen four times the size. He's a pain ridden wreck and every time I think of him, and how he doesn't even look like my Dan, I cry.
The police know who did it but won't tell him. They say he claims self-defence and are threatening to charge Dan as he was leaving a pub at the time and therefore assume he was drunk and disorderly and started the fight.
GRRRRRRR!!
Posted 5/7/2006 7:46:50 PM
People are animals some times.
Totally barbaric.
My friend Mark got knifed by a gang of about 30 yobs a few days ago. Fortunately it was a flesh wound. What bothers me was their reasoning. They had none. They did it because they could.
Then, yesterday, my (as good as) brother, my best friend, my Dan, got kicked in. His whole face is broken. His nose swollen four times the size. He's a pain ridden wreck and every time I think of him, and how he doesn't even look like my Dan, I cry.
The police know who did it but won't tell him. They say he claims self-defence and are threatening to charge Dan as he was leaving a pub at the time and therefore assume he was drunk and disorderly and started the fight.
GRRRRRRR!!
watch this space
Posted 5/6/2006 5:22:06 PM
In a few days I'll probably be a proper happy bunny or down-trodden and in need of a hug. I'll let you know.
Posted 5/6/2006 5:22:06 PM
In a few days I'll probably be a proper happy bunny or down-trodden and in need of a hug. I'll let you know.
Do you ever get that feeling?
Posted 5/4/2006 1:49:10 PM
You know you're headed face first. Straight for a brick wall. Yet you're still smiling.
That's how I am now. It feels unnatural.
Posted 5/4/2006 1:49:10 PM
You know you're headed face first. Straight for a brick wall. Yet you're still smiling.
That's how I am now. It feels unnatural.
I have an unhappy household
Posted 5/2/2006 9:51:32 AM
Is it no surprise I am an unhappy person most of the time? I mean, really?
I have a mother who has been in bed 20 hours out of 24 since as long as I can remember.
I have a twelve year old brother who has clinical depression and I think all he needs is a proper mother to help get him back on track.
A 14 year old monster dwells in the smelly mess that is his lair. Occasionally he comes out to aim a couple of punches in whatever direction he can, make some trouble before playing the traumatised childhood card when my dad gets on the phone to be all high and mighty.
I mean, honestly, how long can one kid blame being a general mong on his childhood? I had a bad childhood too but you don't see me going around packing punches and going out of my way to make people's life hard.
A couple of days ago, everything got on top of me. I ran out the house in tears. I ran 2 miles before stopping on the Bynea Coastal Path. I stood on the bridge and just stared at the traffic going underneath the bridge.
It must have looked like I was going to jump or something because people were giving me scared looks as they passed.
Eventually I walked on and found a bench and took in the view.
I saw the birds swooping in to catch the fishes and children and parents walk by.
It reminded me of the time Dad and I went cycling down that path before he left. I had a crazy haircut and he was laughing because no matter how hard the wind blew it stayed in one place because of all the stuff I had put in my hair.
I thought about how much had happened in the past year. Emma dying, Ben hitting me, the new baby, my total nervous and physical breakdown.
I realised at that point I am far strong than I believe myself to be.
I went home.
God give me strength.
Posted 5/2/2006 9:51:32 AM
Is it no surprise I am an unhappy person most of the time? I mean, really?
I have a mother who has been in bed 20 hours out of 24 since as long as I can remember.
I have a twelve year old brother who has clinical depression and I think all he needs is a proper mother to help get him back on track.
A 14 year old monster dwells in the smelly mess that is his lair. Occasionally he comes out to aim a couple of punches in whatever direction he can, make some trouble before playing the traumatised childhood card when my dad gets on the phone to be all high and mighty.
I mean, honestly, how long can one kid blame being a general mong on his childhood? I had a bad childhood too but you don't see me going around packing punches and going out of my way to make people's life hard.
A couple of days ago, everything got on top of me. I ran out the house in tears. I ran 2 miles before stopping on the Bynea Coastal Path. I stood on the bridge and just stared at the traffic going underneath the bridge.
It must have looked like I was going to jump or something because people were giving me scared looks as they passed.
Eventually I walked on and found a bench and took in the view.
I saw the birds swooping in to catch the fishes and children and parents walk by.
It reminded me of the time Dad and I went cycling down that path before he left. I had a crazy haircut and he was laughing because no matter how hard the wind blew it stayed in one place because of all the stuff I had put in my hair.
I thought about how much had happened in the past year. Emma dying, Ben hitting me, the new baby, my total nervous and physical breakdown.
I realised at that point I am far strong than I believe myself to be.
I went home.
God give me strength.
Sometimes I am too nice
Posted 4/25/2006 9:02:40 PM
i agreed again to look after Robyn. Robyn has a cold though and just wouldn't stop crying until i started crying and mum came and took her away.
I'm practising now - "no kirsty. I will not look after Robyn."
So Adam is still being treated like poo by his good for nothing excuse for a gf. Doctor told him he is suffering anxiety which i have had and she's told him that until he's better she wants nothing to do with him. and she is apparently in love with him. She is as supportive as a custard bra. And the poor lad's esteem is so low he blames himself for her leaving him in the lurch.
Anyways, reason to be happy. Seeing Ryan tomorrow so I have some one to watch the Japanese version of the ring with :D:D:D:D:D
Posted 4/25/2006 9:02:40 PM
i agreed again to look after Robyn. Robyn has a cold though and just wouldn't stop crying until i started crying and mum came and took her away.
I'm practising now - "no kirsty. I will not look after Robyn."
So Adam is still being treated like poo by his good for nothing excuse for a gf. Doctor told him he is suffering anxiety which i have had and she's told him that until he's better she wants nothing to do with him. and she is apparently in love with him. She is as supportive as a custard bra. And the poor lad's esteem is so low he blames himself for her leaving him in the lurch.
Anyways, reason to be happy. Seeing Ryan tomorrow so I have some one to watch the Japanese version of the ring with :D:D:D:D:D
Where to start!
Posted 4/22/2006 6:40:09 PM
Went to the cinema TWICE today, played pool and went to mc donalds and pizza hut. VERY full day and I had an immense time with my friends. Don't think I should have done so much because of my illness but I've not done much in so long I decided to enjoy it!
Good night!
Posted 4/22/2006 6:40:09 PM
Went to the cinema TWICE today, played pool and went to mc donalds and pizza hut. VERY full day and I had an immense time with my friends. Don't think I should have done so much because of my illness but I've not done much in so long I decided to enjoy it!
Good night!
Career desicion
Posted 4/19/2006 12:45:06 PM
I have decided that come september I am going to start training to become either a counsellor or another kind of mental health specialist.
I'm mentally exhausted but I think I have a nack for it. I think I am so tired because I love my friends and want them to be happy.
Posted 4/19/2006 12:45:06 PM
I have decided that come september I am going to start training to become either a counsellor or another kind of mental health specialist.
I'm mentally exhausted but I think I have a nack for it. I think I am so tired because I love my friends and want them to be happy.
My angel
Posted 4/17/2006 7:09:02 AM
Ok, so I love my niece but when she wakes you up at 6am apparently hungry, bawling her eyes out and then refuses the bottle so she can grin at you, it does tend to be annoying. Bless her...
But I am going to think twice about babysitting again because last night, in the moment i took to change her nappy - in that 5 second gap where she had no nappy, she pees. All over the changing mat. It went up her back and in her hair. So I had to bath her. She wasn't impressed because she just wanted to sleep.
Posted 4/17/2006 7:09:02 AM
Ok, so I love my niece but when she wakes you up at 6am apparently hungry, bawling her eyes out and then refuses the bottle so she can grin at you, it does tend to be annoying. Bless her...
But I am going to think twice about babysitting again because last night, in the moment i took to change her nappy - in that 5 second gap where she had no nappy, she pees. All over the changing mat. It went up her back and in her hair. So I had to bath her. She wasn't impressed because she just wanted to sleep.
I smell
Posted 4/15/2006 8:50:42 AM
I need a bath. But there's no hot water. I miss our eletric shower.
Plus I've been reading "good women" and now I have a strange urge to go and get married and become a little housewife.
I should really stop reading for 5 hours straight...
Posted 4/15/2006 8:50:42 AM
I need a bath. But there's no hot water. I miss our eletric shower.
Plus I've been reading "good women" and now I have a strange urge to go and get married and become a little housewife.
I should really stop reading for 5 hours straight...
YAY! Saw my friends (-:
Posted 4/13/2006 9:02:12 AM
Went into college and after six weeks of being away everyone was so pleased to see me. I was shocked. Daz ran up and gave me the hugest hug ever! And paul was giving me chocolate and nathan gave me yoghurt.
But I went home because I fell asleep at the lunch table. Didn't even make it to a lecture.
Posted 4/13/2006 9:02:12 AM
Went into college and after six weeks of being away everyone was so pleased to see me. I was shocked. Daz ran up and gave me the hugest hug ever! And paul was giving me chocolate and nathan gave me yoghurt.
But I went home because I fell asleep at the lunch table. Didn't even make it to a lecture.
For some reason it logged me out and back in as "soulcraver"
Posted 4/10/2006 7:19:06 PM
Sorry soulcraver, who ever you are!
As I said on soulcraver's account:-
Today I have done NOTHING! Ever since getting glandular fever I've been too tired to do anything.
I AM getting fed up and I AM getting bored. The highlight of the day was changing Robyn's nappy which wasn't actually that fun believe it or not.
Oh, and we have a mouse. And I'm too tired to put down traps.
Poo.
Posted 4/10/2006 7:19:06 PM
Sorry soulcraver, who ever you are!
As I said on soulcraver's account:-
Today I have done NOTHING! Ever since getting glandular fever I've been too tired to do anything.
I AM getting fed up and I AM getting bored. The highlight of the day was changing Robyn's nappy which wasn't actually that fun believe it or not.
Oh, and we have a mouse. And I'm too tired to put down traps.
Poo.
FeedBack
Scoots
8/1/2006 7:16:35 PM
Where'd ya go?
Unknown
6/10/2006 8:40:12 PM
Kentucky, Fun? Boring. There is nothing here to do!! We have family in from Michigan... which is sweet. I suppose. :P How are you?
Unknown
6/8/2006 1:48:59 PM
Of course. :P
How is life in Wales? I live in Kentucky, USA. I could hurt Bush. *vomit*
lmzhj
5/22/2006 6:49:34 AM
ICQ:275748552
MSN:lmzhj@hotmail.com
Angelx
5/20/2006 7:00:27 AM
hello! noticed you on my mates page 00pjessica! you seem nice from that thought i would say hi! loved your comment... left about a month ago... mr. boreanaz really is sex on legs. we live in wales to! x
00pjessica
5/18/2006 7:11:48 AM
Yor correct i had the most AMAZING time ever it was sooooooo fun its made my life complete i cant wait to go to the next on in Blackpoolx
prince
5/16/2006 11:11:20 AM
can you be friend with me?
lmzhj
5/8/2006 1:16:09 AM
You are a kind girl ,i will be your friends forever!
Lollipop
5/7/2006 10:00:42 PM
oops! I left that comment while I was on tyler's account! haha! well...yeah..ok! LOL
EmoNotScene
5/7/2006 9:58:50 PM
thank you for keeping me and my situation in your thoughts! lol! :)
lmzhj
5/6/2006 8:23:21 PM
Thanks for your visit!i am form china,can you be friends with me?
00pjessica
5/5/2006 5:52:29 AM
damn wish i could have seen it. sounds ace..... i guess ur a gal that like a good lagh of entertainment. im like that with my friends its a habit....born with it x
Lollipop
4/29/2006 4:12:30 PM
Why thank you for the advice! I think I'll do that. And that is a darn cute baby!
runningwithscissors
4/22/2006 7:35:08 AM
you have an interesting perspective on things....
good to see someone with some insight.....
busyet
4/20/2006 5:08:34 PM
Hi Rebecca...
Why you don't smile for a minute... ?
That's good for a life
telefunkn
4/19/2006 4:45:46 PM
lol becks,my line that got cut wuz, my name is bruton as in bruton wales .I know a little about the area but I'd like to know the life,times and music of your town and pub! thanx:]
telefunkn
4/18/2006 9:39:46 PM
ello becks,I'm from a sick place known as armpit texas!As I see your having the same problems we "the world over" do with sibs and kids!Don't let it get you down, and for god's sake don't get hitched till ya 30.Now I have a strange request.I'm a texan, bu
00pjessica
4/18/2006 12:54:34 PM
great one. you have the right idea girl!!! my best mate is totally in love with him x
00pjessica
4/16/2006 5:47:15 PM
moved to wales when i was 12 so been here 5 years... its ok. not as fun as the city though x
00pjessica
4/16/2006 2:26:47 PM
oh my god just realised you from Wales... i am from liverpool but now live in mid wales near oswestry
8/1/2006 7:16:35 PM
Where'd ya go?
Unknown
6/10/2006 8:40:12 PM
Kentucky, Fun? Boring. There is nothing here to do!! We have family in from Michigan... which is sweet. I suppose. :P How are you?
Unknown
6/8/2006 1:48:59 PM
Of course. :P
How is life in Wales? I live in Kentucky, USA. I could hurt Bush. *vomit*
lmzhj
5/22/2006 6:49:34 AM
ICQ:275748552
MSN:lmzhj@hotmail.com
Angelx
5/20/2006 7:00:27 AM
hello! noticed you on my mates page 00pjessica! you seem nice from that thought i would say hi! loved your comment... left about a month ago... mr. boreanaz really is sex on legs. we live in wales to! x
00pjessica
5/18/2006 7:11:48 AM
Yor correct i had the most AMAZING time ever it was sooooooo fun its made my life complete i cant wait to go to the next on in Blackpoolx
prince
5/16/2006 11:11:20 AM
can you be friend with me?
lmzhj
5/8/2006 1:16:09 AM
You are a kind girl ,i will be your friends forever!
Lollipop
5/7/2006 10:00:42 PM
oops! I left that comment while I was on tyler's account! haha! well...yeah..ok! LOL
EmoNotScene
5/7/2006 9:58:50 PM
thank you for keeping me and my situation in your thoughts! lol! :)
lmzhj
5/6/2006 8:23:21 PM
Thanks for your visit!i am form china,can you be friends with me?
00pjessica
5/5/2006 5:52:29 AM
damn wish i could have seen it. sounds ace..... i guess ur a gal that like a good lagh of entertainment. im like that with my friends its a habit....born with it x
Lollipop
4/29/2006 4:12:30 PM
Why thank you for the advice! I think I'll do that. And that is a darn cute baby!
runningwithscissors
4/22/2006 7:35:08 AM
you have an interesting perspective on things....
good to see someone with some insight.....
busyet
4/20/2006 5:08:34 PM
Hi Rebecca...
Why you don't smile for a minute... ?
That's good for a life
telefunkn
4/19/2006 4:45:46 PM
lol becks,my line that got cut wuz, my name is bruton as in bruton wales .I know a little about the area but I'd like to know the life,times and music of your town and pub! thanx:]
telefunkn
4/18/2006 9:39:46 PM
ello becks,I'm from a sick place known as armpit texas!As I see your having the same problems we "the world over" do with sibs and kids!Don't let it get you down, and for god's sake don't get hitched till ya 30.Now I have a strange request.I'm a texan, bu
00pjessica
4/18/2006 12:54:34 PM
great one. you have the right idea girl!!! my best mate is totally in love with him x
00pjessica
4/16/2006 5:47:15 PM
moved to wales when i was 12 so been here 5 years... its ok. not as fun as the city though x
00pjessica
4/16/2006 2:26:47 PM
oh my god just realised you from Wales... i am from liverpool but now live in mid wales near oswestry
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